A Chosen Reputation

I never focus much on the past because I think we ought not to reflect on it more than we do on enjoying, and sometimes even just acknowledging the good that is today. Dwelling in the past distracts us from seeing how fulfilled we can be today.  If we stay in the past, we will cripple our progress. 

This week, however, I was led to reflect on its importance.  I was in a conference room, when the gentleman said, "let me start off by telling you about the history of our organization". He proceeded to tell me about all their failed attempts to change a community. Whoa...why is he speaking so negatively, I asked myself?  I held on for the point he was trying to make only to hear him admit that their reputation had stunted their growth.  Their efforts would not allow them to reach the heights required to effectuate the change that this community needs.  He went on to say that though his organization could not take the lead, they stood ready to support another's work.  He added, “this endeavor must be led by a fresh face, by an entity with a strong track record”.  I understood what he said and the truth in it, but this thought really had me going. 

I seriously believe in second chances, none of us are perfect; all of us can decide to and strive to be better in spite of our mistakes.  That's the core of the organization and mission that I serve.  My office has seen ex-felons persist until they get an inroad at a job; they prove themselves during the temporary construction work and earn a permanent maintenance job which leads to a new life. Transformations can and does take place.  I believe we can have within us what it takes to make a 180 degree turn. Our future can be greater than our past and present regardless of reputation; that’s how it should be.

Before taking control of your reputation, you must accept two truths:

As good as the future can be, before we can obtain the victory that awaits, we just have to come to terms with our current reputation.

While the effects of one’s reputation are real, they are surely not permanent- not unless you give consent. 

Understanding history will not only teach us what not to do, but also help us strategize a better approach towards the future.  Be very careful, however, that in researching and gathering the information, you do not lose yourself in what no longer is.  Don’t you dare disqualify what could be because of what was!  I am simply saying that we have to wise up.  Reputation is the beliefs or opinions generally held about someone or thing.  It is others’ belief that you have a specific pattern or characteristic and since you can change your habits and characteristics, your reputation should not define who you are.

It is just the opposite: you choose what you become!  Once you know who are, you take control of your actions and essentially choose your reputation. You can change; you can grow to the next level!  So whether it’s your person or your organization:

1.    identify your passion and desire,

2.    evaluate your strengths,

3.    collect information on the environment/the players & that which can compliment your weaknesses,

4.    devise a plan,

5.    own your strategy and

6.    make that change.

You wouldn’t be the first in history to choose your reputation.

A Softy with Thick Skin

A softy with thick skin

Looking back, I think it's kind of funny that I cried after my co-worker said I was too soft.  She was obviously surprised and even annoyed when she told me that I had to get a thicker skin if I was ever going to make it in real estate development.  Of course I was upset, but mostly because I was so soft I couldn't even handle someone telling me to get a thicker skin.

Today, I could be telling you she offended me, but the truth is she challenged me.  In that moment, I DECIDED that I would grow a thicker skin (whatever that meant)!  I'm glad I accepted that challenge.  She was right.  It sure is a tough business and as I dive deeper into this world of affordable housing and community development, I understand more clearly what my former co worker meant.  I gotta' say, I sincerely appreciate her unintended advise.

I survived the initiation into my career.  I can withstand criticism because I know who I am and who I want to become.  I can be unaffected by the needs and feelings of others because I am clear about what I stand for.  I believe that my success is dependent on more than just a thick skin.  I credit my survival in this tough business to my motives.  I didn't pursue real estate because I was seeking sales commissions or developer fees.  My motivation was everything that would come from a “softy”.  I was so moved by the homeless on the streets of Miami.  As a teenager, I asked myself: Why are human beings coming out to sleep on card board boxes when the sun sets? Why are the elderly pushing a dirty shopping cart down the street to nowhere?  Why are seemly healthy and able men pan handling on the side of the road?  That was just wrong and unbearable to my young mind.  I needed to figure out how to change that injustice.   My motivation towards real estate development was and always will be about serving the people!

I am convinced that it's not just about growing a thicker skin.  I believe it's also about fine-tuning your compassion, increasing your awareness of the pain around you and growing in wisdom while you strengthen your stamina to fight the good fight.  Why is there shame in having a heart?  Do not lose your compassion for the hurting. Do not lose your awareness of the wrong. No! Decide to channel that love for good.  Grow a thick skin and use it to kick butt fighting for the good of others! Be a part of making this world less mean and a little softer.

Who’s the victim?: Do justice, Love mercy

Just as I was about to start my college career, I had an instructor advise the new interns, “no pity parties!”  I was so empowered by that and I called upon those words when things got tough. 

In the last few weeks, this advice has resonated louder than ever before, especially as I spend more time in Overtown.  You can’t help to wonder about justice and mercy when you see the faces of the people walking the streets, some just laying against an uninhabited building.  You can see idleness, hopelessness, weariness, fearfulness; each soul carries a real story.   You don’t have to be empathetic to see pain. You may see people who are harmed or made to suffer from an act, circumstance, agency, or condition -victims, as the dictionary would define them.   Some residents would refer to themselves as victims.  

BUT, I am so pleased to say that there are some warriors in Overtown! People who will not throw a pity party, people who dare not call themselves victims!  Strong women, young and old, who are taking a stand to keep their homes safe, they are protecting their children from the drugs and gangs that pull their focus away from their studies, they are brave enough to speak up for what is right and prepare a legacy.   There still are dedicated police officers patrolling the streets of Overtown in pursuit of justice.  They risk their lives every day for the sake of the people striving to break the cycle of poverty.  There are still community leaders who stand ready do their part. 

Are you prepared to remove yourself from the “victim” category?  Are you prepared to do justice, love mercy?

The victory party begins with your decision!