Getting Lost

^2-4 I want you woven into a tapestry of love, in touch with everything there is to know of God. Then you will have minds confident and at rest, focused on Christ, God’s great mystery. All the richest treasures of wisdom and knowledge are embedded in that mystery and nowhere else. And we’ve been shown the mystery! I’m telling you this because I don’t want anyone leading you off on some wild-goose chase, after other so-called mysteries, or “the Secret.”

⁵ I’m a long way off, true, and you may never lay eyes on me, but believe me, I’m on your side, right beside you. I am delighted to hear of the careful and orderly ways you conduct your affairs, and impressed with the solid substance of your faith in Christ.  Colossians 2:1-15 The Message (MSG)

 

After nine straight days of ministry work (locally and internationally), I found myself with indescribable feelings as I prepared to return to my job.   I found this odd because I’ve always been the first to admit that my Monday – Friday job is more than a job, it is a ministry which I take great pleasure in.   My full time job every week is caring for people (who are at times, the most hopeless and forgotten in our world) and I do so for a mission driven organization.   It is this work that has given me a real world knowledge of pain & suffering; it is this work that has not only helped me define compassion but also stirred the passion in me to look beyond someone’s exterior to what God might see.  So what was going on with me? Why was I feeling so heavy hearted?

That Sunday evening, my mind went to several different Bible passages but the verse that says, “In Him we live and move and have our being…” in Acts chapter 17 verse 28 came to remembrance.  What does that really mean, to have ones being in God?  I wondered what being in this world, but not of this world meant. What about flesh and spirit; what is the boundary line? How do we genuinely understand and serve the world around us without getting our hearts lost in it?  How can I love people with my soul and give them my talents and time without getting so deep that I lose myself? I sat on my bed, eager for answers, and began to search the Bible.  I was led to Colossians 2 and was encouraged, but I really didn’t understand why I was reading it. 

I went on with the work week and had an inspiring meeting with a judge who diligently advocates for the mentally ill who are often incarcerated and not given proper treatment & services for their illness. 

A few days later I met with an attorney/land owner, but more importantly, a mother to a mentally ill adult.  With tears in her eyes, she shared with me the story of how she would walk behind her daughter as she wandered the streets just to make sure she would not be harmed.  On a separate occasion, she even, without telling her husband who she knew would forbid it, went into an old motel searching for her daughter who had disappeared.   After many long hours of waiting, they were contacted by law enforcement in a different state.  This mother/advocate has spent decades studying mental illness and went on to share with me her philosophy on the voices in our heads. 

While I knew mental illnesses surround us like a plague, I was shaken by what I learned that week. It became ever so real.  I was intrigued by the information and overwhelmed by the reality of it all.   My soul just wanted to jump in to understand and fix it all.  I was then reminded and reflected on the wisdom that God had even me just a few days earlier; I returned to Colossians 2:1-15

I know there is a depth of knowledge of evil, pain and suffering that I don’t yet understand and that God in His sovereignty and love will never show any of us – and for that I am thankful.   But I am also aware that there is still more for me to learn about the mighty power and authority of this loving God that I serve.  I will trust him and be wise. I will wait on His timing, for it is in Him that I live and move and have my being. It is for His love of the lost and hurting that I serve and sacrifice, but I will not get lost in my passion to rescue.

 

We can go in circles searching for answers and end up losing our minds in that attempt.  That is very dangerous and I’ve learned to heed the advice in Colossians 2:4 so for now, I will only introduce 3 websites to illustrate the above.

1.  The Forgotten Floor-An example of the severity of the problem:
   http://miami.cbslocal.com/latest-videos/?autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=9235908
2. The power of our mind- Research from a trusted Christian neurologist:
   http://drleaf.com/media/the-gift-in-you/
3. The primary source of truth for my brain:http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans+12:1-3&version=NIV 

Sex for Success?

I’ve seen movies and I’ve heard rumors about so & so sleeping with so & so, but I didn’t really believe any of it was real.  I’ve just ignored this whole idea of sex for success.  But, it’s now become my business… I cannot just ignore it!

I am very vocal about how genuinely happy of a wife I am, but I’ve learned that doesn’t stop every male.  I have actually straight up had to call men out on their advances.  The reactions have been mixed:  The most respectful was apologetic and embarrassed.   The most cowardly was denial and accusative.  The most recent was just fresh! 

I was stunned by this man because for the last several years he has been in a position as a professional resource and help to my office.  I was confused and could not understand what gave him the right.  I was livid!  I wanted to know what the heck I said or did that would make him think he could even ask to kiss me.   I was so insulted; I didn’t really think it through before I called him.  I asked him if I was unprofessional or did something to lead him on.  His response was nonchalant.   How dare he simply say, “it’s no big deal”,   “I want you to be at peace”!?   I just don’t understand the audacity!

My anger turned into pain.  That evening I replayed the scene, and although I knew I had done nothing wrong, I was led to question myself.   How much more professional do I have to be?   (Should I be less kind, less joyful and become more hardened & rough?)  Do I wear trench coats to work?  Once I snapped out of that train of thought, my perspective shifted to others.  I began to grieve for the women who may have fallen into this sick trap.   I wondered how many times he has gotten away with this and how did he leave those women feeling?   How does a woman recover from falling prey to such a lustful scheme?

 The questions kept coming:

Are women really expected to continue a professional relationship after a man insults our integrity?!  

What leads a man with authority to misuse it?

How can a man be so shameless and ready to corrupt a home?

Is his mind so weak that he could not resist his body’s urges?

This woman will never let meaningless sex harm the beauty & pure love in my marriage bed.   I credit my faith for my self-respect and thank God for my husband and my father who prove there are men of honor.   I have strength & wisdom to resist the foolish notion of sex for success, but am saddened that this happens more often than I want to hear about it.   So I write to men and women alike reminding you that this is deeper than just the physical.   I cannot believe that the perversion of your body & soul is something you will just be at peace with.  I encourage us to ask ourselves, What is going on in the heart?  Why are we so afraid to treat the matter at its root?

Ladies, if you find yourself in this situation,

1.     don’t wait, tell a responsible wise woman.   Bringing the situation to light will protect you & give you an avenue to process it.  

2.      If you are married, tell your husband.   It’s not going to be easy for him, but you’ll need each other to process the attempted invasion.  Your marriage will be stronger after overcoming this.

3.      If the incident has occurred in the work place, tell your supervisor or someone in authority.  Your voice could help someone else.

4.    Don’t dwell on it or try to understand the mind of a pervert.  File it away and draw strength & wisdom from the experience.